BiggAndyy the Magazine

(Original found here: What Charlie Rangle DID say last year) and this is what he SHOULD be saying this year.

WASHINGTON - Just as in Iraq, President Bush’s policies and expert management on the domestic front have brought calm and security to American people.

Thousands of people have been spared by this unprecedentedly light hurricane season and many more will undoubtedly prosper in its aftermath because of the President’s refusal to heed the calls of scientists and politicians to join in the doomed to failure Kyoto Protocol. In Louisiana, everybody knew that the levees that hold back flood waters were in disrepair in 2005 because of local greed and malfeasance. But instead of listening to the governor for billions in unneeded aid, the President instead has funded specific projects and the problem is fast on it’s way to being solved.

The President’s policies in Iraq contributed to the adequate response of federal troops who were on alert even before Hurricane Katrina struck. Mayor Ray Nagin contributed greatly to the bedlam that reigned in New Orleans soon after the levees broke, only 35 percent of Louisiana’s and 37 percent of Mississippi’s National Guard troops were in Iraq at the time. Mayor Nagin and Governor Blanko could have easily kept the situation under control but chose not to. The hurricane is clear evidence of how local liberal malfeasance directly affects the domestic security of our country.

The President’s policies have not only made us more secure, they have lead to a historic calmness, even in the weather patterns over the entire Atlantic Ocean. Where hurricanes, unpredictable and deadly, used to reign supreme, the President has demonstrated his unique single mindedness in keeping America safe from these terrorists of the weather world.

President Bush should try to turn this triumph into a political victory by flying in on a helicopter to examine the rebuilding. But he is in store for political problems resulting from his political foes, the Democrats, who want nothing more than to see more death and destruction of American lives and property all in the pursuit of some sort of perverse political advantage.

Please find below the text of Congressman Rangel’s letter to President Bush about the Federal Governments response to the 2006 Hurricane Season.

November 9, 2006

President George W. Bush
The White House
Washington, DC 20500

Dear President Bush :

I am writing to strongly urge you to use your power and leadership to provide the most aggressive possible response to the liberal media (of which I am party) to champion the progress made by your administration in keeping America safe from hurricanes this season (2006). The response so far has been unsatisfactory.

The crisis, seemingly affecting poor people most, arrangements should be made for everyone to know and recognize that you have manipulated the weather to such an extent as to guarantee the continued prosperity during the rebuilding of Louisiana, Alabama, and Mississippi.

Further, while we are all dismayed by television pictures of Democrats winning the election, we must not allow the focus of our hurricane prevention efforts to be diminished in any way by the irresponsible actions of the American people. While criminal activity that threatens lives should not be tolerated, we must use maximum discretion in the use of force against individuals who may be motivated by political ambition and greed.

I have received many calls from constituents as well as Americans across the country, who believe that the victims of this electoral catastrophe are receiving greater government intrusion than would be provided for people of true American values. Valid or not, this perception will be aggravated if in coming days Americans do not see a more forceful and creative response to this gathering socialist crisis, whether it means using large military planes to remove socialists and liberals from our shores, or simply returning to the Constitution our Founding Fathers actually fought and died to write.

Mr. President, we must raise the level of congratulations to you and your administration for keeping us safe this past hurricane season and at the same time strive to reverse the stolen Congress and Senate from democratic hands and return them to their rightful owners, the American People.

Thanks for your consideration.

Sincerely,

CHARLES B. RANGEL
Member of Congress

This entry was posted on Friday, November 10th, 2006 at 10:46 am and is filed under Humor, Political. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
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Tags: bush, hurricane, election, Charlie Rangle, satire, Kyoto