- If the enemy is in range, so are you.
- Incoming fire has the right of way.
- Don’t look conspicuous: it draws fire.
- The easy way is always mined.
- Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
- Professionals are predictable, it’s the amateurs that are dangerous.
- The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions:
- When you’re ready for them.
- When you’re not ready for them.
- Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.
- If you can’t remember, the claymore is pointed at you.
- If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.
- Don’t draw fire, it irritates the people around you.
- The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
- When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.
- If it’s stupid but works, it isn’t stupid.
- When in doubt empty the magazine.
- Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than you.
- Anything you do can get you shot. Including doing nothing.
- Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can’t get out.
- Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
- A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
- Don’t ever be the first, don’t ever be the last and don’t ever volunteer to do anything.
- The quartermaster has only two sizes: too large and too small.
- Five second fuses only last three seconds.
- It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.
Wonderful BBC Parody! I Love You Kitchen Gun!
Cillit Bang is parodied by Derek Bum.
Tony Blankley did such a fine job explaining how Carbon Offsets actually work I have to pass it along for everyone to enjoy.
…carbon offsets are a rather strange concept. Let me use a simple metaphor to explain it: Let’s suppose that Al Gore goes to an Italian restaurant and eats a loaf of garlic bread, a plate of lasagna, a bowl of spaghetti and meatballs, an extra-large pizza with seven toppings, a couple bottles of Chianti and a large assortment of pastries. As a result, he puts on 10 pounds. But he is deeply concerned that mankind is getting too fat. So he pays 10 peasants in Asia $10 each to eat nothing for a week. Although they are already thin, by starving themselves for a week, they each lose a pound. As a result, after a week, mankind is weight neutral. Al Gore weighs 10 pounds more, 10 Asians weigh 10 pounds less — and Al Gore is given another Nobel Peace Prize for his leadership in keeping mankind’s waistline in check.
And there you have it. Wonderful metaphor, wonderful example, and another great atta-boy to everyone that voted to keep this glittering jewel of colossal ignorance away from the White House.
Tags: al, gore,, carbon, offsets,, nobel,, townhall,, tony, blankley
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